Would You Rather: Have a Healthy Gut or Be 15 Pounds Thinner?

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Hello, friends, it’s been a while and I hope this finds you well.

Me? Well, yes, things are fine. My tiny bits of hair are hanging on so far (I usually lose some in winter). Sadly, though, I’m losing at the losing-weight game.

Yes, it’s true, weight is winning and I hate it. I miss my favorite pair of hot-pink corduroys. I miss being able to wear a pair of jeans for more than a few months before the inner thighs give out. I miss having boobs that actually fit into my bras, rather than oozing out in an unappealing, quadra-boob way. I miss getting jackets zipped. I couldn’t even button a (former go-to) blouse for a funeral last week.

I should be happy that my gut seems to be functioning much more effectively these days, but along with potentially absorbing more nutrients, I’m also absorbing more calories, yes? Yes. And it feels like no matter how hard I try, I’m gaining when I normally would’ve lost weight, given the number of calories I’m consuming. Right?

Ummm, maybe not.

See, as I was driving along today, bemoaning my never-ending sorrows that either stem from my loss of hair or my newfound weight or a dozen other perpetual irritations, I had a revelation.

Sure, I’m likely absorbing more calories and nutrients now, but these last couple of years, my nutritional absorption and clothing sizes aren’t the only things that have gone gonzo-expando. I realized this today: My laziness-to-calories ratio has skyrocketed, too.

Yes, yes, it’s true, I tend to rack up a lot of mileage walking Ella. Today, my phone-pedometer has me just under 18,000 steps, for example, and I don’t even keep the thing on me all the time. Imagine!

But, alas, back in my slenderific days, not only did the magic of poor digestion help a bit, but I was phenomenally more active. I walked miles back and forth to work every day (five miles each way, for years), and for fun, I ran another 5-7 miles (or more) six days a week, and I lived on the top floors of unelevatored buildings and carried groceries and laundry and even beds and armoires and drunk friends up those long and winding flights. Often, and happily.

Now, I walk Ella in the morning, and then I sit for many hours writing. I walk Ella in the late afternoon, then I sit again for many more hours, sometimes writing, sometimes just dinking around on the interwebs while thinking about writing. I think about working out, too, while I’m sitting. I even sat down to cancel my Barre3 subscription last week, although I fondly, if vaguely, remember the days when I loved it.

Back in the days when I regularly ate 3,000 or more calories a day, I also burned at least that many. Now, when I eat far fewer calories, I (mentally, if not physically) feel starving. And so sometimes, I eat more. Lots more. And I rarely, if ever, burn more.

Yikes. I’ve spent many days and nights this last year complaining to myself (and you, truth be told, apologies), wondering if healing my gut was worth the weight. Would I rather have healthy innards or be 15 pounds thinner?

Reality check: Better health overall is worth the weight gain, of course. But with no muscle tone in sight and thighs that, at the slightest provocation, bust out of the very fabric of America — the same denim that generations of gold miners and coal miners and cowgirls and boys have touted as the strongest fabric on either side of Topeka — it’s time to get moving again.

In my life, lazy begets lazy, then begets obesity and I don’t want to go down that road again, I crawled it years ago and it wasn’t fun. To me, no matter how good my gut feels, it still feels like a setback if I don’t feel good about myself. I know when my body feels its best because I’ve been there, and this isn’t it.

It’s highly likely that I’ll rarely, if ever, have days again where I clock 15 or more miles regularly between walks and runs, and make dozens of daily trips up and down the stairs in a fifth-floor walkup. But I can certainly get back to a point where climbing one flight of stairs doesn’t leave me winded. And when I do, maybe I’ll finally, truly appreciate my glowing and gorgeous gut health.

{Photo credit: Pixabay, via pexels.com, thank you!}

{Note: These are my own experiences with applied kinesiology and holistic healing, which clearly aren’t meant as medical advice for anyone else. But, I know a lot of friends and family members are grappling with a huge variety of autoimmune issues and other ailments, so I’m happy to share my experiences. And if this is your first visit and you’d like to follow chronologically, click here. Otherwise, enjoy!}

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